03.20.06

iCan’tHearYou, and that’s the way I like it

Posted in shopping, new york, gadgets, iPod, rant, subway at 11:24 pm by admin

One habit I brought with me from the East Coast involves walking around in public places with my iPod, Shure E3c earbuds inserted deep into my ears, listening to music or podcasts while I go about my business.

In New York City, this was really nothing strange. One out of every three people on the bus, subway, or street would be plugged into an entertainment device of some sort. I think it may be a side effect of New Yorkers’ notorious anti-social mentality. It is a city, after all, where you’re advised not to look anyone in the eye on the subway.

I discovered early in my iPod-listening days that walking around constantly plugged in also can have its dangers. For instance, you can’t hear someone approaching you from behind, or (in my case) the subway zooming up along the track beside the platform that you’re walking dangerously close to. Feeling the train graze my elbow when I didn’t even hear it coming woke me up to the danger very quickly.

Now that I’m in California, the iPod-walk takes on a whole new meaning. I now plug myself into music even while I’m shopping at Target. While everyone else is listening to screaming children, arguing couples, and other generally annoying people, I’m enjoying the Pet Shop Boys.

People seem quite puzzled by my behavior, though. They walk up to me and start asking if I need help, or asking me other various questions, and I have to slowly remove my earbuds and ask them to repeat the question. Usually it’s something completely irrelevant, boring, or obnoxious, and I just go back to listening to my music.

For those of you who haven’t experienced this yet, try it! You’ll be shocked at how much more tolerable a trip to Fry’s is when you can’t hear it.

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03.14.06

Quickie: Move it, you human obstacle

Posted in rants, rant, quickies, people, rudeness at 7:59 pm by admin

If you’re standing with your “posse” in front of the doors that allow people to enter and exit the building, and you don’t move when people try to pass through –

If you’re standing in the stairwell gossiping with a co-worker, blocking people from going up and down the stairs –

If you stand in front of both microwaves while cooking your leftovers, completely unphased by the radiation, making it difficult for someone to get by you who is clearly waiting to heat his or her lunch in the unused microwave in front of you –

Then you, my friend, are a human obstacle. Get the hell out of the way so that people can move back and forth in these areas that are clearly designated for moving.

Oh, and try not to act so surprised and offended when people are walking through your group and pushing around you to get to where they need to be.

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The great onion-ring snatching fiasco

Posted in rants, yahoo, rant, people, rudeness, food, dirty, gluttony, gross, nasty, onion rings, stealing, theft, unsanitary, urls at 1:29 am by admin

Today, I bring you a tale of horror from URL’s, the Yahoo! cafeteria.

Since I am attempting to eat more healthy things throughout the day, I decided to treat myself to an overpriced $3.25 chopped chicken breast at the grill at URL’s.

Mind you, it wasn’t exactly lunchtime, as it was 2:25, and the cafeteria was on the verge of closing. Because of this, the chef working at the grill was taking every spare moment he possibly could to clean up his workspace and take things to the back when necessary.

There was only one other person in front of me in line — we’ll call him “Tom” — who was waiting for the chef to finish cooking a chicken breast for him as well. Tom was standing there waiting patiently for his chicken to finish cooking, and while he was waiting, the chef had to step away for a minute.

And that’s when it happened.

Just after the chef was out of sight, Tom shamelessly reached his grubby little hand right into the onion ring vat under the sneeze guard, and grabbed an onion ring and ate it! I was absolutely stunned, and Tom didn’t even notice that anyone had seen him, nor did he bother to look around to make certain that his crime had not been witnessed.

There are people like Tom all over the place. There’s the lady who grabs a handful of cashews and eats them from the giant self-serve container at the grocery store. There’s the guy who takes a piece of candy from the self-serve candy and eats it like it’s his for the taking. There’s the woman who picks things out of the salad bar and eats them while she’s making her salad, all the while knowing that the clerk can’t charge her for salad that’s already in her stomach.

I’m still shocked that he had the nerve to do this right in front of me, for two very succinct reasons:

  1. It’s nasty and unsanitary. Why should anyone else get onion rings that his fingers may have touched?
  2. It’s STEALING.

I was too aghast to say anything to “Tom” and so I just let him walk away with his chopped chicken breast, like nothing had happened. The only thing that gave me the tiniest bit of satisfaction was knowing that I’m not so enchanted by fried foods that I can’t resist grabbing them when they don’t belong to me, like a dog or cat jumping onto the table to snatch a bite from your dinnerplate when you step away for a moment.

I, sir, am not an animal.

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